he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize