I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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