living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize