***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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