dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize