I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I'm really busy with my period
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