Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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