Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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