can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize