Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
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She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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