It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
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