so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
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Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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