Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize