It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
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If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
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"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
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