i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
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they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
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Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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