and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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