You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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