Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my being single is dangerous.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Randomize