we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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