the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize