I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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