I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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