I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i dont even know how to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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