Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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