The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
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The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
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I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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