I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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