i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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