you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
sex in a hospital.. check
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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