I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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