i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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