he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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