you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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