on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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