True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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