Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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