I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize