apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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