you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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