so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize