Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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