I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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