Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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