Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize