he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize