im having a threesome with these popsicles
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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