i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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