What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize