So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
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you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Randomize