Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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