Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
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just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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